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Thank you for letting us ruin one of your weekends to celebrate us ruining the rest of our lives.

One great way to make your wedding planning way less stressful is to break up.

I would gauge my eyes out before I see your selfie.

You're Grammar Sucks

Sorry you have to dress for all four seasons at once.

Only Maury can settle this.

Was it obvious I don't care?

Jesus loves me but I make him wear a condom.

It's not a walk of shame if I'm proud.

Home is where the vibrator is.

Don't mind if I don't.

Mentally dating you.

Condoms Can't Protect My Heart

Lol Nothing Matters

Good enough.

Only Kanye Can Judge Me
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